Today was my HIV doctor’s appointment and while at the clinic waiting one of my former employee called me, her message was “Kerry don’t worry, I know that you love to worry.” Two hours later my doctor showed me that my CD4 count has fallen from 650 to 450. I lost 200 points in no time. He said medication for you and I said Doctor NO. He said ok and suggested that we do another one. He did his regular test and said your chest is healthy but you have to be careful because of this fall in your CD4 the lower it is the more demential it is for you.
I sat there asking him what I should do to boost my CD4. He answered by telling me to eat right and exercise. Although I already know that this was the answer I still asked because the worrying as started. I also faced the fact then and there that I have to start eating properly that I wasn’t doing. His next response was you are now due to do another Viral Load test. So he gave me the papers to do another CD4 and Viral Load. The result I got today was the test I did in December 2009, at the time I re-did a HIV Positive test which confirmed that am indeed HIV Positive (I redone this test because there were persons in Davey’s Chatroom who told him that I wasn’t HIV positive and he has banned me without confirming it with me) . It also confirmed that I have no other Sexually Transmitted Disease.
Upon reaching home I went to my Facebook writing a status update when what Sidoney said came back to me ‘Kerry don’t worry, I know that you love to worry’. At that time when she said this I never know what she was saying to me and so I started telling her that am at clinic and about my association with Eve for life. Her credit got finished before I was able to complete my sentence to her and when I called her the connection was bad. The last time I spoke with Sidoney was in 2008 but today God used her to reassure me.
Yes I begin to worry and was explaining in my Facebook Profile Status about my CD4 when those words came back to me then I saw that God is indeed there for me. My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ as used His angel to tell me all is well not to worry. Now am smiling because Jesus Christ is indeed in my fight and so I have lift myself up again. Yes the devil have me for some minutes but he as lost out again.
Now am smiling again why should I worry when I have a Lord and Savior who died on the cross to give me life more abundantly, why worry when my Heavenly Father Jehovah, is the possessor of Heaven and Earth. Should I still worry when the Holy Spirit the comforter and teacher is there to remind me of things that I have forgotten so that I can be happy even after an hour of sadness. I have three different Heavenly Spirits working into one accord who love me and looking after me. So I have no need to be in depression.
Thank you Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior, I love you with all my heart. It is indeed well when Jesus Christ is the center of our Joy.
Psalm 145 is what I leave with you.